it takes time.

It's the little things, Tenma thinks. It's been a year since they all rounded up their ragtag group of actors into Mankai, a year since they've all moved in together and gotten a hold of their expectations and what was also expected of them.. Going to school, balancing the occasional work with the troupe, getting homework done.. It's been a whirlwind, but a pretty damn good one. And it's been a few months since he and Yuki got into that.. conversation. Or more like the start of one which dragged on and on until it became an actual, more fleshed out conversation. They'd been going at it like usual on a brisk Saturday morning, Yuki going off about some jacket Tenma left on the floor (it was actually hanging off the side of his bed and fell down, but sure, whatever, not like he can get a proper word in anyway) and Tenma grumbling that it's too early for this crap. "Huh? Are you serious right now?! Look, hack, I know you've probably never had to share a room before, but there are some things you have to consider to be a normal human about it. Or are you just stupid?" Tenma threw his hands in the air. "I'm not stupid!" "Oh, yeah? Tell that to your grades. Taichi told me you're retaking another exam," Yuki carried on, tidying up his vanity. "You're not going to keep trying to slide by on your acting, are you? Because it's getting old." "Ha," Tenma folded his arms, cocking his head to the side. He feels like he's tried. He's done his time, having all of these back and forths with Yuki to play whatever sick game he tries to rope him into, but he's reaching his limit. Enough was two exits ago. "You think you know everything, don't you? Like you're some kid with all the wisdom in the world just 'cause you're not afraid to step on some toes?" "Smarter than you," Yuki bit back, facing Tenma now. "I've seen you struggle to tie your shoelaces on the first try." "Wh--alright, first of all--!!" Yuki reached a hand out and shoved Tenma in the chest. "Save it. Just keep the room clean and leave me alone." Before Tenma could say anything else, Yuki had left the room and Tenma was grumbling incoherently as the closed door. It was stupid. The way Yuki always seemed to snap back at him, knew exactly what button to push and when. It got him so worked up at times that he felt like.. well, he felt like maybe sometimes he took it one step too far. Because he didn't know how to navigate conversation well enough, and he was easy to rile up, and it's not anyone else's fault but his that maybe sometimes he takes things a little bit too seriously. But still. Something felt wrong about that last exchange. It sat in his gut like the stew Matsukawa left out overnight once and didn't tell anyone about it, and so anyone who ate it had occupied every bathroom in the dorm for at least an hour that day and the next. So instead of letting the nasty feeling brew, Tenma got to his feet and darted after Yuki, hoping he knew just where to find him. * Yuki sat on the floor doing some detail work on the winter troupe's costumes while Tenma sat across from him, watching quietly with his phone in his hand as a decoy. He liked watching Yuki work. As soon as he came to terms with his feelings for the boy, he found himself appreciating all the little ways Yuki would hum when he was satisfied with something, or how his eyebrows scrunched together while he tried to figure something out. It was.. cute. "What are you looking at, hack?" Tenma blinked - how did Yuki know he was looking without even looking up?? He swears the guy is like a witch sometimes. Unlocking his phone anyway, he scooted closer to pretend he hadn't heard clearly. "Huh?" "Your phone. What's so interesting that you're just sitting there uselessly instead of offering to help like a good boyfriend?" He can't help the stupid grin on his face when Yuki calls him that. In this place, their room, their space, everything feels just a little more special. He leans over just enough to nudge Yuki's knee with his foot and gets a sharp look of disapproval in response. "Bah, come on. You're just gonna say I'm doing everything wrong anyway." Yuki gently pokes through Tenma's sock with a needle and grins when he yelps. "That's half the fun." Tenma holds his (barely) wounded foot in his hands and pouts. "Why are you up working on that stuff right now, anyway? Dress rehearsal's not for another month." "I know, but I want to be ready. Sometimes I feel like changing things after I see it on them, and lucky for me I can make the actors try on my costumes whenever I want." Yuki holds up the jacket he's been detailing and smiles when he holds it up to Tenma. "Isn't it nice?" Temma smiled at first, then turned his expression smug and shrugged. "I guess. If you like mediocrity." Yuki frowned deeply and dropped his work to the floor with a huff. "You're such a pain! You have bad taste, bad hair, bad--" It didn't take much of Yuki's rant for Tenma to scoot closer and poke him in the forehead. "Hey. I was kidding, you need to relax or you're gonna get wrinkles." Yuki swatted Tenma's hand away and pouted. "Like you even pay attention to that stuff." He started putting his things away, clearly a little bothered, and Tenma felt like the tips of his fingers were tingling all the way up to his elbows. They're quiet for that moment, with Yuki shutting boxes a little more roughly than he should and Tenma handing him something every once in a while. When everything's finally cleaned up, Yuki stands and dusts off his shorts before grabbing his shower caddy and leaving Tenma to stew in all of his emotions and thoughts. He has to be honest with himself - he doesn't really know how to do this whole thing. When they agreed to go out (more like Yuki confessed and Tenma shifted his feet for a week before asking if they were dating now), Tenma thought they could just.. continue like normal. After all, they worked well already, right? And maybe it wasn't like all those romance movies he'd acted in before, but that stuff was super fake anyway. Nobody wants that in real life. (Right?) But still, he has to wonder.. what exactly is it that Yuki wants out of this? Them, together.. Yuki said he likes him. That's.. good. But Tenma isn't really sure what to do with that still. They kiss goodnight sometimes, but it's only ever the briefest brush and Tenma isn't even sure if he always meets his lips or not. Maybe he's not focusing enough? But when he thinks about it too much.. They never talked about any of this! But are you supposed to talk about it, or is he really just that stupid and doesn't know what to do? Ugh.. He's still groaning to himself when Yuki returned from the bathroom and raised an eyebrow at him. "You're still here?" Tenma frowned. "It's my room, too." Yuki just rolled his eyes and went to put his caddy back, and Tenma thinks he can smell Yuki's shower as he walks across the room. "I meant on the floor, dummy. It's bedtime." Tenma simply kept watching him from the floor as he went through his nighttime routine - some moisturizers and other products from Azuma, Tenma remembers. He worried his lip between his teeth for a moment before closing his eyes as if he's going to get beaten up for what he's about to say. "I was just.. thinking." "Oh, did it wear you out so bad you couldn't move?" "Hey!! I'm being serious." Yuki paused, then turned around in his chair to look at Tenma. His bangs were pulled back with a fluffy headband, and Yuki's shorts rode up his thighs just enough that Tenma caught himself glancing at it before Yuki replied. "Okay. What's wrong?" "Can y--ngh. Just.. finish up first then come here, will you?" Another moment. But Yuki obliges, turning back to the mirror to rub in his serum and pulls his headband off before quietly shifting back across the room to sit next to his big blob of a boyfriend. "I'm here." Tenma nods small, and grunts. "Thanks. Uh.." He half expects Yuki to get frustrated and leave, to say he's wasting precious beauty sleep time, but he doesn't. Instead when Tenma looks up to Yuki, he thinks he might have seen an angel. His face is soft - almost glowing - eyes round and refreshed, and with the tiniest edge of concern reflected in them. Yuki just waits for him quietly and Tenma tries to use that to build up his strength. "I, uh. Am I.. doing this right?" Tenma rubs the back of his neck awkwardly. Yuki raises an eyebrow. "Sitting?" "No! Gah--why do you always take everything so literally?" "I can't read your mind's subtext, hack. You're gonna have to talk about," he gestures vaguely with his hands, "this. If you want me to get it." Tenma runs his hand through his hair and then down his face and sighs. "Am I a good boyfriend?" Yuki stares. And stares. And stares more. Until he finally bursts out laughing and Tenma feels his face explode bright red. "Oh my god, that's what you're sitting here being all pouty about?!" Yuki manages between laughs, wiping at his eyes. "You--you should see the look on your face!" "It's not funny, damnit!! I--quit laughin'! God!" Tenma tries to grab at Yuki to stop his laughing but Yuki just keeps on, swatting his hands away and eventually holding them with a goofy grin on his face. "You're so stupid," Yuki mutters, bringing Tenma's hand into his lap and playing with the fingertips. Tenma thinks he can see a little blush on that face, and he wonders.. Before he can overthink it, he leans in to kiss Yuki's cheek. Yuki flares up bright red then too, rivaling Tenma's blush, and he tosses his hand back to him. "H-hey!! What the hell was that?!" "Wh--I'm tryin', here!! But you sit there and make fun of me and laugh at me and--and I just thought you looked real cute just then!" Tenma huffs, flustered beyond reason. "I'm trying, too! I'm.. ugh. Why do you make everything so difficult?" Yuki pouts, turning to face Tenma. "Do it again." "Wha.. huh?" "Kiss me, idiot." Tenma blinks like he's trying to make sure he's awake. That this is real. And then.. before either of them can change their minds, he goes for it. He kisses Yuki, and for once it feels like it's for real. Their lips brush for longer than just a moment, and then he can feel Yuki returning the kiss and it's - it's heaven. When he pulls away he gets one look at Yuki's flushed face and leans in to kiss him again. And again, and again. His hands reach up to hold Yuki's face and he hears him whimper, arms snaking up over Tenma's shoulders as they keep coming back to each other. Tenma feels himself melting with the warmth of it from his fingers to his toes.. It's not like all the dramas he's filmed. It's not like lightning, or fireworks, or an ocean wave coming to take him away. It's sunlight, warming his skin on a hot summer day. It's the feeling of the hot sand around him, morphing around and enveloping him. It's Yuki. Yuki's hands in his hair, Yuki's gasps in his mouth, Yuki's tongue on his. They finally part for air and Tenma plants a kiss on Yuki's forehead before tipping their heads together. Yuki curls into him a bit, and Tenma hums inquisitively. "I don't.. I don't know either, if you're a good boyfriend or not. I just know that I like you." Yuki leans back a bit, eyes focused on the floor before they come up to meet Tenma's. "..I like us." Tenma feels the smile spread across his face. "Yeah, I.. I like us, too." Yuki's hands settle on Tenma's shoulders and he gives them a firm pat. "Good. So can you get over this whole mopey thing and get ready for bed so I can steal your blanket?" Tenma laughs like bubbles are coming out of his throat. He gives Yuki another kiss on the cheek and nods. "Yes, dear." He thinks they're gonna be okay.